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" But we do fornicate amiably enough," I interjected."And you will live a life of sobriety?" she asked."No, absolutely not!" I protested."And stop chasing whores?" she suggested."Only when you are indisposed," I agreed."And will love me?" she asked."I can try," I agreed."And you will lie and say I am beautiful," she asked.I looked at her, "There is no need for me to lie, you are beautiful," I told her."Then so be it!" she agreed, "I don't want to marry a duke anyway, he smells." she confided and after a suitable period she slipped from my room.I found my clothes at length and dressed as smartly as yesterdays attire would allow and ventured forth, my friends had already been apprised of my betrothal by my intended Miss Hannah and I sat down to my meal to answer their taunts."Pinkerton, what meal is this, a late break-fast or an early lunch?" some wag asked,"I call it Brunch," I said, "And later I shall take High Teadinner." Don't be an idiot!" Bobby Fawkes chided, "Brunch, what a. A student looked at me kind of weird and pointed to the auditorium. My God, I thought Matt said a dozen students. The auditorium held hundreds of people and was already half full with more students arriving every minute.A nice lady came up to me and introduced herself as Ms. Angela Smiley. She explained to me that I was the last speaker for the Earth Day week celebration. She promised me that, if any students got out of hand, they knew that they would be expelled from college.There were a few remarks made by Ms Smiley about Earth Day and what it meant, when it began and so on. Then, Ms. Smiley introduced me as Robert Mathais from the coal industry. I was a nervous wreck. If Matt were here now, I would wring his neck.There were a few sparse claps from the audience as I approached the podium. I told them about myself and let them know that I had been a coal miner for over thirty years. I was proud of what the coal industry had done for America. One person kind of yelled out something.
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